Tradition, Nostalgia, and Pre-memory
I don't know if many people have made a correlation between pre-memory experiences and nostalgia.
I always seem to get nostalgic around the holidays. Perhaps is that Citizen Kane allusion of our childhood somehow being the best and richest part of our lives… Even with the negative connotation of nostalgia, its also a dear and bittersweet reminder of how precious life can be.
This is Jade's first Christmas. We thought it appropriate to have all the traditional decorations, lights, the tree, the ornaments, the wrapped gifts, the caroling songs. (She even got her own little Christmas tree in addition to the one on display in our family room, featuring several baby items like booties, pacifiers, toys, and a "J" on the top!)
Who knows if she will remember any of it. Chances are, probably not. And yet, does that fact detract from our desire to provide our children with the best experiences anyway?
This is why even from her first day on the planet, I have wanted her interactions with her reality and her surroundings to be nurturing, supportive, positive, peaceful.
Right after being born, Jade's experience was for the most part calm and gentle...even on the examination table. By avoiding trauma, I hope she continues her sweet disposition into adulthood.
This is also why I wanted her first Christmas to be awesome. Even though she has no concept of any of it, I feel it is creating a foundation of tradition somewhere in her mind, be it subconscious, but still something there that may one day be nothing more than an intangible inkling somewhere in her emotional response to seeing a Christmas tree or hearing a Christmas carol. I want her to love Christmas with a whimsical zeal.
Its probably just because of my own endearing connection with this time of year that I want her to have the same nostalgic notion when she's my age. In that regard, I suppose its somewhat of an ego-centric cause for which I am standing. But that doesn't sway my motivation to provide her with rich experiences, for the holidays and throughout her life in general.
Maybe we don't yet understand the depth of how pre-memory experiences play on a person's psyche. I would like to think that what I am doing now makes a difference in the kind of person she becomes and her emotional disposition in life.
Needless to say, we got her all sorts of presents…probably too many, and probably spent way too much money. Lord knows the packaging was just as enticing to her as the $100 presents that lied within! But the biggest gift I hope to give her is that same sense of nostalgia…not in a lost or desperate or depressing sense, but just that timeless, indelible delight that we sometimes encounter when we smell a fir tree or catch snow flakes on our tongue, and are given a glimpse of our own pure, uncorrupted self, before we were cognizant of the worries of the world, and it was instead filled with magic and wonder.
