11 Things I Didn't Know Before Becoming Pregnant
1. The ultrasound will not reveal gender until the 11th week. According to Mayo Clinic, “At the beginning of the 11th week of pregnancy, or the ninth week after conception... your baby's external genitalia will start developing into a penis or clitoris and labia majora.” *
A blood test can determine the sex at an earlier stage, but it is less accurate than waiting for the ultrasound results. I went with the blood test primarily because I needed to have a blood panel done for other AMA testing. I checked Y next the box asking if I wanted gender testing and had a jump start on knowing the sex.
2. A woman can safely deliver 48 hours after her “water breaks”. In some instances, the amniotic sac will actually seal itself back up after leaking out fluid. Once the membrane is compromised, there is a risk bacterial infection affecting both mother and child. However, you have a safe 48 hours of labor before it is crucial to deliver. That being said, the doctor on staff during my labor called it at 36 hours. (probably due to my “high risk” status.**) Read the full story of my delivery here.
3. The umbilical cord continues to pump blood, hormones, and nutrients to a newborn for several minutes after delivery. I was originally going to do my civic duty by donating my cord blood for a noble cause. I figured, banking was a little too expensive, but donating for the benefit of others was the next best thing...Then I did more research about cord blood and discovered that allowing the contents of the placenta to reach your newborn child before severing the connection was actually bringing them a plethora of much-needed substances, including stem cells, which can help them have a robust start at life.
Your body, knowing that it will soon be expelling both the baby and the placenta, will try to send that last little bit of cord blood in a last ditch effort to ensure survival of your newborn. This may be especially vital in premature babies, who are still developing their organs at a Wolverine-healing pace. That final infusion from the mother may be the difference between life and death if the child is born underdeveloped.
After that revelation, I decided to let the cord blood do its magic now instead of later, or for someone else.
4. Pregnancy Brain is a real thing! I have always been kind of “absent minded”...but during my pregnancy, my short term memory seemed to have really taken a dive! You will need to keep a notebook and write things down when you remember them. Don't rely on your own memory and scheduling ability. Your body is sending excess blood into building your baby. Rely on technology or your significant other during this period. During labor, relying on my hubby was the most crucial element that got me through the delivery. Consider that labor is going to be the apex of the “pregnancy brain” phenomenon. I knew through research that I was not going to be in my right mind during labor because of a thing called “labor land”. The concept of time was COMPLETELY altered during my labor. I was in labor for 36 hours, although, I swear to you, my first hand perspective of it was that it was maybe 5-10 hours tops. Time meant nothing..the whole day went by and I was in an almost altered state. I am sure that my natural hormones were playing a huge part in this, primarily because I denied any pain medications for the first 36 hours of labor. I felt like, if anything, I was being rushed. I couldn't understand why the on staff nurse wanted to “induce” because I was not progressing quickly enough; I felt like I was right on track with my body's schedule. But then, due to an ultimatum, I was given the choice to submit to a synthetic oxytocin infusion or to a C-section (both were my “worst case scenarios”). I did not want an operation done, so I went with the drugs, but not without the logic & reasoning of my hubby, who took control of the situation when he realized I was not of sound mind. In fact, he did an “interview” with the epidural specialist on call at the time, while I was going through severe contractions, because we were affronted with the horrors of epidurals during our research while I was pregnant. He assured us it would be ok and that the risk of chronic problems, for me and baby, as a result of an epidural were minimal. I would have kept going through my contractions, denying medication, until I was faced with a forced C-section, had it not been for my hubby's sound assessment of the situation. For that matter, my delving into the concepts of “The Bradley Method” really paid off. In fact, according to Ina May Gaskin, a laboring mother should NOT be confronted with “mental distractions” while in the process of child birth, because it upsets the natural flow of labor, and constricts the cervix. Knowing this in advance, I told my hubby, “You are making the crucial decisions while I am in labor.” and while he made sure I was on board each step of the way, he did stand as a clear beacon of rationality while I was in that vulnerable and hypnotic state, and knew I was susceptible to the doctor's or nurse's pressure at that point. We had a game plan going into it and that helped us monitor and assess the situation on an ongoing basis while trying to stay the course. In other words, while we ended up keeping to very little of our original "birth plan", having a plan B and plan C, as well as a clear understanding of what we both considered a "worst case scenario" made it easier to make good decisions in the heat of the moment.
5. You have the right to turn down or postpone certain procedures and medications both during and after childbirth. I signed a waiver denying my newborn's antibiotic eye ointment, because I was on a constant antibiotic IV during labor and thought it an unnecessary and cruel thing to subject my newborn to. I also signed off on waiting 24 hours before doing the K injection they do as a precautionary treatment for internal bleeding for the baby's first few days of life. I wanted to wait to do this AND the blood panel they did, where they pricked her feet several times to test for a variety of diseases, as we wanted her to remain unhindered from trauma, as much as possible when she was first born. That being said, we did go ahead with her scheduled recommended immunizations because we figured the benefits outweighed the risks. We had the fortune of going to a progressive hospital that also allowed me a couple of hours of "skin-to-skin" for bonding and nursing right after birth. If your doctor tries to rush your newborn out of the room, make sure it is because of a medical necessity instead of just "protocol". For that matter, research hospitals before the 11th hour. Some hospitals send your newborn to a room full of other newborns in a little cubicle. While others let you keep your baby with you in the room the whole time, such as is the case with the Sharp Mary Birch Hospital. Know your rights as parents going into it so you know what you can and cannot say no to. Don't just be pressured into procedures “because they tell you to”...Always try to make an informed decision.
6. A newborn's stomach is about the size of walnut. This is why colostrum is essential to providing them the nutrients they need. It is like super concentrated breastmilk on steroids. Every single drop is jam-packed full of nutrition, enzymes, and hormones. A newborn is going to be very busy growing, so in preparation for this, your body generates the equivalent of an energy bar. This is why you don't need to give an infant water. They get all the hydration they need from breastmilk, along with all the calories their little growing bodies need to thrive.
If you did water down the breastmilk or formula, as the case may be, they would be full before they got enough calories to sustain them long term; though a newborn still has a lot of nutrients from their mother and can get by eating very little for the first few days.
7. “Shushing” an infant is actually an effective sleep aid. I was rather shocked at this method...it looks more aggressive than how the baby perceives it. See the video here:
8. Swaddling is a very effective sleep aid as well, at least for the first few months. The newborn is used to being in a confined space, and swaddling duplicates the sensation of still being in the womb, the same for the “white noise” of shushing. Here is a video on how to swaddle a baby.
On the topic of white noise, I have found an awesome white noise AND music machine that works perfectly...You can see my review of this and other baby products – the sound machine is number 9. The music seems to do better than the white noise as she gets older... I remember when she was first born, singing her a “lullaby” actual woke her up more than calmed her down, but now my singing is more effective than “shushing” her. Here is a great resource for lullaby lyrics.
9. You can help a baby's bowel movement by pushing their feet up towards their chest...and don't worry, they are flexible! If baby is straining to go poopie, you can assist them by doing baby leg exercises, like doing “bicycle” movements, and rocking them back and forth. Gently massaging their tummies may sooth the pain from gas. Sometimes setting your baby on their stomach can also help move things along and pass gas.
10. Speaking of being on their stomach, “tummy time” is an important developmental exercise that aids in stimulating muscle growth and motor skills. It is also recommended for about 20 minutes a day starting at about 3-4 months old to help prevent flat spots on their skulls, or plagiocephaly.*** Studies have shown that children who get tummy time on a regular basis also start learning to crawl at an earlier age. However, you should not leave them on their tummies unattended at this early age. Which leads me to #11.
11. It is best to put infants to sleep on their backs. This will help prevent suffocation and SIDS. Other things you should avoid to prevent these things are: Not using sleep positioners, pillows, blankets, bumpers, and toys in the crib or bassinet. Although there is controversy around the use of pacifiers, using these have been known to actually DECREASE the chance of SIDS. So if a pacifier helps your baby in falling to sleep, by all means, use it! Its not until their teeth start growing in that pacifiers may have a negative effect, because prolonged usage can deform tooth growth.**** However, as long as you can wean them off of pacifiers by the age of 2, any tooth deformation should correct itself within 6 months. The other risk associated with pacifiers is an increase in ear infection incidents. This is more due to germs on the pacifiers than use itself. Keep pacifiers clean on a regular basis to keep this risk to a minimum.
